Talking to Your Children About Your Breast Augmentation
To tell your children about your breast augmentation or not to tell them. That is the question. The answer depends on a lot of things, including your child's level of maturity, understanding, and comprehension of adult matters.
The first thing to consider is your child's level of curiosity, awareness, and ability to understand what breast augmentation surgery is, and why you are having it.
You may choose to say nothing and hope your children don't notice. But as you know, children are very attuned to their parents' bodies. Any changes may trigger questions and comments.
It may not be an easy conversation to have. Below are some comments and tips from moms who had breast augmentation surgery that you may find helpful.
My daughter that is 14 years old was excited for me, but got tired pretty quick with helping me out typical teenager, haha. My son that is almost 9 years old was very concerned that I was in pain and was always wanting to make sure my "cut" was okay. He still asks me if I'm ok now. Poor little guy.
My 3-year-old son always wanted me to pick him up. So after my surgery I showed him the top of my strap and said it was a big band-aid because Mommy has a boo-boo. He really seemed to understand. He doesn't want me to pick him up even now for fear of hurting me. It was a little embarrassing the other day when he told his preschool teacher "mom's boobs have a boo boo."
I have a son aged 13, a daughter aged 10 and a son aged 3. I did not choose to tell them. I just didn't want to send them the wrong message about self-esteem. As you know, society labels plastic surgery patients as unstable, insecure individuals. I do not believe that to be true, but didn't really know how to make them understand that.
I have four children. I told them I needed to go in and get some surgery done. They immediately were concerned. I re-assured them I was not sick, and this was by choice. The only thing I told them specifically about what I was going to do was "to have a couple of things fixed. Nothing major." I immediately told my older children what would happen in a step-by-step fashion.
I think the most important thing for my family is that everyone knew what I would be going through and that mom was going to be OK ahead of time. The only ones who noticed were my two little ones. The 7-year-old commented "you look bigger." I simply said, "Yes, honey, a little."
My 3-year-old would never rest his head on my chest because I didn't have pillows like Grandma. He does now! That's the best!
My 14-year-old is opposed to it because he does not feel that I should be doing something to my body that is not natural. (This from a child who tells me on a daily basis that he needs braces). My 5-year-old has no real concept of what it means but he will realize it once it is done because he is a little boobie-aholic.
~ Darlene H
I have a 10-year-old daughter and a 18-month-old son. Obviously my son is not old enough for me to tell, but I did tell my daughter. She is very mature for her age and would have surely figured it out on her own anyway. I got my breast augmentation due to loss of volume from breastfeeding both of my children for 10 months each and honestly had nothing but skin left. I had told her after I was done breastfeeding my son that I could not wear any of my old bras or bathing suits and that I was thinking about getting a breast augmentation to get my boobs back to the way they were before I had children. Once she saw me in the shower she completely understood.
I have always been very open about my body with my daughter. She just turned 11. She sees me naked all the time, as we get dressed in the same room. Even though we each have our own room and our own bathroom, she comes into mine most of the time. She is in that age where girls are really starting to wonder and learn about their own bodies. When I decided to have my surgery, I told her from the start that I was thinking about it and why. She seemed to understand that I wanted to look better and that I didn't "need" new boobs, I wanted them for me. Now, she likes to help me pick out new tops, and thinks it's so cool that I shop at Forever 21.
~ Debbie B
Both my girls know. The 20-year-old is jealous and sooo excited for me. She is a second year nursing student so I am getting all kinds of advice from her. I'm very nervous and she keeps telling me it will be all right. My 15-year-old is excited too. She keeps telling me "you'll have cleavage. Won't it be great to look in the mirror and kinda see them under your arms. You need to get you a two piece mom " They both think it's great. The only negative has been that I'm not allowed to go bigger than them LOL. They're both full C's. Don't know where that came from.
My son is 6 and my daughter is 2. I told him about having breast augmentation. He is OK with it and just wants to help. I told him I will need some help making his bed, serving himself and not making too much noise when I sleep. He once saw me searching the Internet for information on the surgery and he told me: "I WANT YOU TO HAVE THESE BREASTS!!!" (I was printing things I wanted and things I didn't want). He is a little concerned about the size!!! More than his father! LOL.
I think he is all right with it. These days a lot of people are having breast augmentation. I think it was my duty to tell him about it.
My daughter is 18 and just brought her friend by so she could say "happy boobie day. "The older they get, the more they understand for sure! My whole family is telling EVERYONE! I think that children are very smart, even the little ones. Truth, if spoken with sincerity and honesty... they will understand. I am the type that does not hide things.
~ Kathy B
I have a 2-year-old daughter and an 8-year-old daughter. I wasn't concerned about my 2-year-old other than needing help lifting her, bathing her, etc. I was, however, concerned about what my 8-year-old would think about the breast augmentation. I honestly didn't think she was mature enough to understand what I was going to do. A couple of weeks before my breast augmentation I told her that I would be having surgery and she would have to help out with her sissy. She agreed to help with whatever she could. Then the question was asked: "What kind of surgery?" I feel guilty that I didn't tell her the truth, but I plan to when she's older. My reply was, "I'm getting moles removed." The day after my surgery she came up to me while I was resting and looked at my chest. She said, "Mom, look how lucky you are! When they removed your moles, your boobies got bigger!" LOL!!
As you can see, the decision to have breast augmentation surgery and be open about it may be bonding for some mother-daughter duos. For other moms with younger kids, the discussion may center around safety concerns. And others still may have their reasons for keeping mum about their breast implants. Ultimately, it is up to you to decide if you should tell them, what you should tell them and when to do it. Their reactions may surprise you, comfort you, and even make you laugh out loud!